Personal space, please!
Every now and then I stumble across a resource that is simply perfect to use in my classes. I then have a stroke of absolute genius and create a lesson plan that I just have to use in every single lesson because I know it's good.
This is one I'd like to share with you!
Personal space can be a hard concept to grasp for lots of reasons. Firstly, little children have a much smaller "personal bubble" and they assume yours is the same size. Children on the spectrum and with additional needs may also struggle with this because it can be hard for them to consider the other person's feelings and how uncomfortable they might feel.
I used the book "Can I give you a squish" by Emily Neilson to facilitate this lesson and the little ones I initially did it with, loved it.
I think the idea of Kai, in the story, just assuming the puffer fish wanted a squish is one that most of us can relate to. I also think we could probably all think of a time when either we, ourselves or someone else has felt as uncomfortable as the puffer fish does with that invasion of his personal space.
A lot of what I teach is through play and I hope these activities will give you some ideas for to how to talk about this in your classroom or at home:
We spoke about the other gestures Kai tried in the story, rather than just squishing everyone, because everyone is different. We then played a musical statues type game where I called out each of the gestures and they went around practicing them on each other (note: I left out the crab pinch for obvious reasons!)
We then went around to everybody asking "what would you like?", giving the children the chance to choose a gesture they wanted from each child. Importantly, when we spoke about this afterwards, even the littlest 4 year olds said they felt happy or loved because their partner had listened to them
We played the personal space game - yep, there's a game for it, too! I wrote each child's name on a piece of paper, plus a few items that were in the room. The children took it in turns to choose a piece and then had to go and stand next to that person or item, giving them, what they considered, sufficient personal space. After doing this, I introduced the idea that we can measure what's a good distance by using our arms, so we played again and measured it this time.
As lovely as it is to have a 'squish' from your little one, or for them to play with your hair or stroke your back, there may be times when perhaps it's not appropriate or they do it to a stranger. Encouraging them to get into the habit of asking before they do these things means they'll more likely also ask before they do it to a friend, another adult or a dog. You can also get into the habit of asking what kind of touch they'd like because even the youngest ones can recognise that it feels nice to be respected like this.
Happy Squishing!
Love, Charlotte x